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Aquest estiu me’n vaig a NY així que no els estranyi si començo a taladrar-los amb el tema. Com en tot viatge desitjat, m’agrada planificar les coses que poden passar i, entre elles, hi ha la possibilitat –no buscada- de morir. Si es dóna el cas d’haver de traspassar, m’agradaria que fos així:

1) Que un sicília anomenat Clemenza m'estranguli amb un fil de nylon en un restaurant de Little Italy.

2) Cosit a trets per una estrella de rap de la costa oest mentre surto d’un club acompanyat per dues porto-riquenyes espectaculars.

3) Aixafat pel placatge d’un linebacker de 153kg, a la iarda 47 del Giants Stadium.

4) Amb el crani obert per un cèntim de dòlar llançat des de l’últim pis de l’Empire State.

5) Per algun tipus de catàstrofe externa que pot anar des de invasions extraterrestres a tsunamis, canvis sobtats i extrems del clima o Gozillas que surten del mar.

6) Envestit per un avió comercial mentre pujo a la planta 55 d’algun gratacels.

7) Rebentat per les bales de la retallada d'un ciutadà que consideri que estic envaint la seva propietat privada.

8) Després de fotre la última mossegada a una giant burger.

9) Atacat per un ós grizzly a Central Park o per qualsevol altre mamífer com ara un esquirol.

10) Trepitjant-me els cordons de les sabates i caient en una mala postura.

34 comentaris:

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Per cert (aquí va el consell del listillo que ja hi ha estat), suposo que ara és mala època però si pot vagi a un partit de la NBA, val molt la pena. I dini algun dia al Katz Deli (el de l'orgasme de la Meg Ryan), hi fan un pastrami excel·lent i el lloc és curiós i freak a la vegada.

Si necessita més consells (que suposo que no ja que ja en deu tenir suficients), no ho dubti.

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3. Si sou colla, agafeu una limusina. Si la podeu omplir, us sortirà a uns 10 dolars per cap.


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1. Hooters = Estafa. Jo no volia ni entrar-hi perquè no em mola pagar per a que m'escalfin la bragueta.

2. Beisbol. Un esport molt tècnic per gaudir davant una tele. A l'estadi és avorrit, no veus res, els jugadors estan gordos i dura 4 hores.

3. Creuar Central Park caminant. No necessita explicació.

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